I am so incredibly lucky to be able to do what I love and love what I do. I ache for those who are stuck in a dead in job, who hate going to work, and who dread going back on their time off. I remember feeling like that working as a waitress. I actually enjoyed my job but I didn’t love it.
We moved from Cedar City so easily because Kurt, my husband, didn’t enjoy his job. It became better towards the end for him, not because he knew the end was in sight but because management had changed. But now we are here in Highland and I’m still able to enjoy what I do, even more now because I’m going to school, but Kurt is still unemployed. It has been so hard.
The other day I came to Kurt in tears. Apologizing for making us move. I wasn’t too sure about my grades, I hadn’t booked anything recently and I felt like our decision to move up was a mistake. Had I heard wrong? Was I blinded by the excitement of the possibility to move from Cedar City that I misunderstood my intuition to move up here? I felt like I had. And it was on my shoulders.
If it wasn’t for my silly day dream to leave Southern Utah and attend school at UVU Kurt would still have a good paying job. We’d still be able to put Drew in sports or some other activity. Brody would be able to play too, or t ball, or some other fun sport. We’d probably be able to afford a second car, instead of having to ride the bus or if I did take the car, Kurt wouldn’t have to take Drew to school on the bike. We’d still have all our furniture. Especially my kitchen table. How I loved my kitchen table. I cried for days after we sold it. Silly, huh?
But my beautiful, loving husband reassured me. He reminded me that he too had the feeling to move up here. That it was the right choice and it wasn’t a silly day dream. He reminded me that these possessions were just materialistic things and that what mattered most was us. Our family.
It’s so easy to forget what’s important when you’re lying in bed, and can’t sleep, because you don’t know how you’re going to make it. When you’re praying and praying for the phone to ring, or when you check your email just visualizing an inquiry from a bride. But it’s not there. It’s easy to forget what’s important when there are more application rejection emails than spam. Or when you’re filling up your gas tank and you cringe when you’ve just realized you over drafted on your debit card. That not only means there’s a fatty $0 but also a nice $35 fee. Or when your teacher gives you your materials and book list and you think about selling your kidney to afford it all.
And I could go on. and on.
I’ve decided to take institute classes this semester and I’m so happy I did. The other day our teacher decided at the last minute to change his lesson. He said he didn’t know why but he knew somebody needed to hear it. That person was me. He talked about putting Christ at the center of our lives and when we do things get easier. Not necessarily that things will start to be all honky dory, but things get easier. He likes to keep us in the dark and not reveal his plans so we rely on Him.
I’ve felt like I’ve needed to blog something about our situation for months. I didn’t because number 1. I’m awful at writing and putting my thoughts into words. number 2. I didn’t want to look desperate or sound like a sob story. number 3. I figured it was unprofessional. Why in the world would anybody put this out there and especially on a business blog?
A few days ago my sweet friend Yan took the words right out of my mouth. And it gave me the courage to do the same.
I would absolutely love to photograph your family, wedding, children, or even your dog. If you’re considering booking a wedding I’ve been very flexible with my packages and I’m totally willing to work with you. Incase you’ve missed it, February is the time to have your photos taken.
I just can’t do it by myself anymore and I can’t pretend that I don’t need you. Because I do. And my family does to.
So call or email me and we’ll have fun, okay?
Yeah, I’m happy with it. And glad the project is over. My first photo of Audrey was of really bad quality and was causing a lot of banding around the shadow parts. After my teacher helped me for a while he finally said I had to get a new photo. Thankfully he pushed back the due date by two days. Stay tuned for more school projects by yours truly.
Love you!
